Monday, April 4, 2011

One of the Great Mysteries of Life


As I get older there are still some things that I'm not sure if I will ever understand, a few of the great mysteries of life.
     One: Why is it when you're in a hurry is that the time that things seem to "hide" from you? Two: Why is it when things seem crazy busy a coworker reminds you about the faculty meeting that you have to go to, and that grades are due, all on the same day? Three: Why does it never fail that on the days that it rains cats and dogs your umbrella is nice and dry, in your car! Four:
Oh, and my favorite...You finally remember to bring your camera to an event and just as your about to snap some pictures you battery dies!! and Finally...FIVE: Boys, Men, Guys, the Male species in general are a complete mystery to me!!! I just don't get guys at all!

I have had the opportunity to be friends with my share of guys and even a few I have had feelings for but as of yet nothing has developed into anything beyond friends.
Now I know some of my friends say that I have high standards but even the ones that have measured up to most of my standards still baffle and confuse me.
(I will not name names here, just because this Southern girl has her share of manners.)

      I have had the guy friends and that's all they will ever be. You tell them that and they are fine, they are great. But I've also had the type of guy friend that shares with you that he has a crush on you. But when you don't return the feelings, he gets his pride hurt and you lose the friendship. I've also been on the flip side of this and have developed feelings for a guy friend and when I was honest with him, instead of just being honest with you, they lead you to believe that they are good with seeing where things go. Quickly you realize that is not so when it seems that they have dropped off of the face of the planet. Aren't we all adults? Can't we just be honest and say, "Hey, I like chatting but thats as far as I want it to go," whats wrong with just saying what you feel? There's also the guy that gets mad when you say that you believe a certain way and feel that your passing judgement. No not passing judgement, I'm just saying that this is how I believe. I can choose who I will spend the rest of my life with and if our beliefs don't match then thats my choice to not continue into a long term relationship. I am by no means saying that how you live is wrong, just may not be activities or beliefs that I want to share. Oh, and there has also been the the guy that apologizes for everything, and I mean all the time!

     I don't know, maybe I just got some bad information about how guys were? I thought they were direct, to the point, no fluff, tell you like it is, get over things quick, deal with things and not let emotions get involved, and for some strange reason I thought guys didn't tend to play the games that they like to say that we girls play. They continue to be a mystery to me because I have found that guys can be very emotional, something I'm not used to! They also speak in circles and are very broad. I believe that this tendency to be vague broad allows them to sometimes keep things flexible, to not have to commit to a certain one way. Now don't get me wrong, I don't by any means to attach this label to all men. My motto, when it comes to relationships, has always been "if this isn't going beyond friends then lets not waste each others time and lets just be honest with each other and say that." This has not always gone over that great with some guys....I don't get that?? And I guess since I'm like that I think that they would return the favor, not always the case. I always like it when you and a guy and chatting and texting pretty much every day and then all of a sudden...nothing? What happened?? Why no explanation? As my sister would say (one of her favorite quotes) "He's just not that in to you!" Well I can take you telling me that, but say it! Oh, and I just love the "We can still be friends," haha really?? There have been only a few times that I have seen this truly happen. And don't we all just love when I guy tells you "Your going to make someone a great wife and I will wish it was me." haha that's an even better one. And one that I heard not to long ago, "You should be grateful that you don't have all the baggage that comes with a bunch of relationships and when you do get into a relationship its going to be great for the both of you." You don't tell someone this when your trying to tell them that you don't want to be in a relationship with them. You know what I'm thinking, "If I'm so great and you still don't want me, you must be the best lair or the biggest dummy," neither of which helps me at that moment. It's like a band-aid, just be honest its going to hurt but just do it and get it over with. If were all adults we can all still be friends.

Stop, Yield, Go???
     Now guys in your defense I will say that we girls do sometimes take things the wrong way. Some of this is due to the fact we are maybe just a lil dumb when it comes to y'all.
Girls just because a guy text you all the time, stays up most of the night talking, and may even ask your advice about random things does not mean that he is interested in you, he may very well just be bored and have nothing else to do.
Just because he invites you to meet his parents does not mean that he thinks things are really serious, he may bring a lot of friends home and people going in and out of their house is not a big deal.
Also, if he ask you about engagement stuff it doesn't mean he's thinking about y'all getting hitched, no he may just be asking so you can give him advice on how to ask your friend or the girl he likes.
Oh, and if they want to get together with you they will! If they say they need to check their schedule... well they may really need to check it, but it doesn't take more then a few days to do so.
      So these are just some of the things that continue to make men a mystery to me. My sister says I could have learned all of this from watching a few movies...and one of my good friends believes that most of the life's lessons can be explained through Meg Ryan movies...maybe I should go watch "When Harry Met Sally" one more time??


Tony Putman said...

Wow! that is all.

syllatham said...

I did say a mystery... Haha

Anonymous said...

love ur logic - its so logical

- amy

Jessica said...

Love the post!
Love is complicated, for sure.