Sunday, November 25, 2012

Giving Thanks and Gripping for Reality

     Well, a Happy Thanksgiving to yall. I always love Thanksgiving since it seems to be the kick off event to the Holidays...and if you know me you know I love me some Holidays!!!

     We had a great and Blessed Thanksgiving as always. All of the family was in except one cousin and her family. Our family tradition is that ever Thanksgiving we always go to my Uncle's, my Dad's brother. It always includes WAY too much food and a ton of people, and this year was no different.
Here's a pic of just the center island...there was more food on the other two counters! I sometimes wonder if we haven't gone overboard just a bit when it comes to the Thanksgiving spread.

I didn't really get too many pics this year. Here are the few I did happen to snap.

My Mom and our friends Vicki and Irene 

 Me and my niece Molly
and of course we had to make silly faces :) 

 Chuck (another friend of ours) sneaking some food

 Uncle Walnut carving the bird

Getting ready to start eating...Lulu is snapping a pic of the feast haha!!

We had over 30 people, a ton of family and some friends, all come together in one house with one goal...To eat and laugh! I'm happy to say we did a lot of both.

     But now it's my last day of turkey day freedom break and I'm sadly trying to get a grip on reality and the fact that I have to go back to work tomorrow. I really should be doing lesson plans right now....but thats neither here nor there. Plus I have found many great things that "need to be done now" instead of the all hated LP...Like this blog post! 
     I hate the first day back from a break. Everyone, teachers and students, have a case of shock that they had to return back to reality and it seems that the whole first day everyone is walking in a daze trying to get their groove back. I know that I left a ton of things waiting on me on my desk. When that 2:35 bell rang I thought, "Oh, I will get this after the break, I'm just ready to go and start my vacation already." But now it looks like I will spend my first day back catching up. But I'm trying to be positive....that was me and Sammie Lynn's goal this year to be positive. 

I can't believe that this semester is almost over. I counted and we only have 20 school days till Christmas break!!! Yep, you better believe I'm already counting down the days! Sadly this all seems to be going by sooooo fast, everything seems to just fly by this year. I'm still in shock every time I sign the date and write Nov. What happened to the rest of the year??? 2013 is looming towards us and I'm just not ready. I always hate the two weeks between the semester. I have NO desire to do anything remotely related to work and yet I have to get ready for a whole new semester and all new classes and students.  But I keep remanding myself to be positive and to look for the good things haha! 

     So I've been reading and doing a new devotional called Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyers. It really good and has some good truths in it. My Mom got it for me due to the fact that my Doc and I figured out that one of my triggers for my migraines is stress induced. So my Mom said that most of my stress is related to the thoughts that I think and that I have to take control of my thoughts and surrender them to God. So thats what I have been doing...well trying to do. As I've been reading this Bible study some of it really has hit home with me. One of the days really hit me between the eyes with something that I'm really guilty of. 
The title of that days study was, "Be Positive." Now like I just said earlier its something I have been trying to work on. My friend Sammie and I had talked about it at the beginning of the semester as related to our jobs...but really its something that I really need to work on for my whole outlook on life. I'm very much a "Glass half empty" kind of girl. One part of the study really jumped out at me and made me say, "Yep, thats me and thats it." The quote that got me was where Joyce says that God had dealt with her and her negativity and she realized that her whole philosophy was, "If you don't expect anything good to happen, then you won't be disappointed when it doesn't." Wow! if thats not exactly how I feel...I guess that a lot of my negativity is in some way a protective thing. I don't want to be let down so I just assume that it's not going to work out then I'm not disappointed when it doesn't and if it happens to them it's a lil more of a pleasant surprise. She also said that sometimes this thinking comes from being disappointed over and over in the past. 
     Now I know I have a very blessed life...but if you went back in time and chatted it up with my 16 or 17 year old self then you will see that my life really hasn't turned out at all like I planned! I can't complain, it's just not what I planned on at all! I swear I thought at 18 Mr. Right would waltz into my life and we would have the big fairytale wedding and by 25 I would be half on my way to a big family. Boy was I ever off! Then it seemed that I hopped from one thing to another. I struggled through school and for the longest felt dumb...then I found out I wasn't, just had a lil thing called a learning disorder. But along this path to where I am I thought for sure I would run into Mr Right and realize that we just needed to figure somethings on our own before getting together...yeah, that still hasn't happened. haha! So the idea of what I thought my life would look like seemed to fade with each passing year and I guess I figured it was easier to not look forward to it because then I was just disappointed. So then I figured God had other plans and so I just started going with it. I did the dental assistant thing while I worked my way through college and towards my teaching degree, all the while wondering when my life was going to finally start.
 I know how sad, that I seemed to think that my life was going to start once I had a husband and kids...but I did. Then I started to really embrace the single life and tried to act like it was so great so no one would view me and the sad lil girl that can't get anyone to marry her (heck or even date her it seems).  
     I guess a big part of it was that I'm such a control freak and this one thing I just didn't seem to have any control was very frustrating! But I started to see this as just a season of my life and that it too would one day pass. It's one of the reasons for my blog name. Life equals seasons and change. The change part has always been hard. It's something you want yet fear in some ways due to the unknown. I'm still working on being positive about the place and season that I am in. 
One of our biggest obstacle I think is the view in our heads of what we think our life should look like. I want to be the person that is positive about all things, even when things are not what I pictured. I want to remember that I'm not in control and that my life is Father filtered. I want to be thankful for all the many different seasons and changes that make my life what it is and what it's going to be. I want to stop worrying about what should have been and focus on what is and what can be. I want to trust Him to work all things to His good in His timing. 

     So I continue to work on being positive in all things. Joyce says, "Positive minds produce positive lives. Negative minds produce negative lives. Positive thoughts are always full of faith and hope. Negative thoughts are always full of fear and doubt." 

I want to have faith that I am right where I should be and hope that He will lead me where He knows I should go. I want to put aways negative thoughts that bring fear and doubt. Matt. 8:13 says, " shall be done for you as you have believed." 
My next study is titled "Think About What You're Thinking About." Sounds like something I need to think about :)

I always seem to start my blog post thinking I will just quickly type up a few things about what has been happening and a few thoughts I've been thinking about...then bam! Out of nowhere I seem to type and type and type. So if you have stayed with me this far Congrats to you and I will now wrap it up. Haha! 

~Till Next Time


Tony Putman said...

great blog Syl! I'll start next year...ha!

Kim V said...

Awesome post! I'm definitely going to read the book :-) the thoughts always get to us!

Sammie Lynn said...

This is by far one of your best blogs yet!!! I loved it... and makes me think back to the talks we had a while back! You have redirected my thoughts... stay positive and don't live for what "I think" my life should look like!

Jen said...

I LOVE Joyce Meyer!!